In a poor zoo of Africa, a lion was frustrated as he was offered not more than 1 kg of meat a day.

The lion thought its prayers were answered. When one day a Dubai Zoo manager visited the zoo and requested the zoo management to shift the lion to Dubai Zoo.
The lion was so happy and started thinking of a central A/C environment, a goat or two every day.
On its first day after arrival, the lion was offered a big bag, sealed nicely for breakfast. The lion opened it quickly but was shocked to see that it contained few bananas. The lion thought that may be they cared too much for him as they were worried about his stomach as he had recently shifted.
The next day the same thing happened. On the third day again the same food bag of bananas was delivered. The lion was so furious; it stopped the delivery boy and blasted him, 'don't you know I am the lion...king of the Jungle..., what's wrong with your management'? What nonsense is this? Why are you delivering bananas to me?
The delivery boy politely said, 'Sir, I know you are the king of the jungle ... but... you have been brought here on a monkey's visa'!!!

Moral of the Story.... Better to be a Lion in your own country than be a monkey elsewhere.

 

Posted by SmileJokes Tuesday, December 15, 2009 0 comments

 

Hey !!!  All Bachelors and the Blessed ones ( Married ) for u 2 learn and
appreciate .
.......

The Silent Treatment

A man and his wife were having some problems at home
and were giving each other the silent treatment.  
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
"Please wake me at 5:00 AM " He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
and he had missed his flight.  Furious, he was about to go and
see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by
the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.



WIFE VS. HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied , "in-laws"



WOMEN'S REVENGE
  "Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished
to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television
set in her purse.
"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.
  "No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
 and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally."


W O R D S
  A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000.
    The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat
everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"

CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
" The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first,
and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and
 you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my
coffee."
Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible
that the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament
and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says
.........."
HEBREWS"
 

God may have created man before woman,
but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

Posted by SmileJokes 0 comments

 

 

நண்பர்களே

 

தமிழக மக்களின் நிலைமையை பாருங்கள் !!!

 

 

Thanks

Prakash R

 

Posted by SmileJokes Sunday, December 6, 2009 0 comments

First Class Manager (FCM) is going thru' a forest one evening when his car breaks down. He looks around and finds a lone house. He knocks the door which is opened by a stunning woman.

FCM: Can I spend the night at your place?

Woman: Well. I live alone.

FCM: I'm an honourable man, a FCM.

Woman: I got only one bed.

FCM: No problem. I'm an honourable man, a FCM.

Woman: I go to bed naked.

FCM: No problem. I'm an honourable man, a FCM.

Woman: Be my guest, FCM.

Next morning while leaving, FCM finds the woman busy with her poultry.

FCM: Good birds you got there.

Woman: Yeah.

FCM: How many cocks and how many hens?

Woman: Two hundred hens, one cock..

FCM: But I can see over a dozen cocks around.

Woman: Only one cock over there. The others are first class managers.
 
 
Thanks
Priyan

Posted by SmileJokes Saturday, December 5, 2009 0 comments

MARRIED LIFE 

  
  

MARRIED LIFE - MAKES MY EYES TEAR UP, SUCH A HAPPY ENDING !!
  

******************

  

A couple had only been married for two weeks and the husband, although very much in love,

Couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.

So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."

"Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife

  
"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face," he answered.

"I'm going to have a beer."

  
The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?"

She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer,

Brands from 12 different countries:  Germany, Holland, Japan ! , India , etc.

  

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was,

"Yes, Lollipop... But at the bar... You know... They have frozen glasses... "

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying,

"You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?"

She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that

She was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said,

"Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...

I won't be long.  I'll be right back.  I promise.  OK?"

"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?"

She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and little quiches.

"But my sweet honey... At the bar.... You know there's swearing, dirty words and all that! .."

"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?

LISTEN UP CHICKEN SHIT!   SIT YOUR BLOODY ASS DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKASS?"

  
And...they lived unhappily ever after.
*************
 
Next Jokes :
 
  1. A wise schoolteacher
  2. Final Exam
  3. Autopsy
  4. New Year's Day Prayer for one and all
  5. lawyer
  6. Joke of The Day
  7. COMPUTER TERMS
  8. Teacher
  9. Computer Users
  10. QUOTES FROM EMPLOYEE APPRAISAL REPORTS
  11. The twelve days after Christmas
  12. Excuses For Missing Work
  13. 21st Birthday
  14. Get a Job
  15. Whatever it Takes
  16. Don't Speak
  17. The Union House
  18. Marcel Marceau
  19. Computer Helpline
Thanks
SkVm

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

Two men were grumbling over their problems.
 
 
The first man said, "My wife left me for a man who drives an ice cream truck."
 
 
His friend began to ask, "You mean..."
 
 
"Yeah," the first guy replied. "She left me for Mr. Softy."
 
 
Thanks
SkVm
--
 
 
 
 
 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS Friday, December 4, 2009 0 comments




Posted by Picasa

Posted by SmileJokes 0 comments

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

Sam was furious when he found out the checking account was empty. When he asked Anni, she simply said, "It's my turn."

"What do you mean, your turn?" yelled Sam.

"In bed," Anni explained, "you've been making early withdrawals for years. Now, it's my turn."

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS Thursday, December 3, 2009 0 comments

An Irishman who, with his wife, is employed on a truck-farm in New Jersey, recently found himself in a bad predicament, when, in attempting to evade the onslaughts of a savage dog, assistance came in the shape of his wife.

 

When the woman came up, the dog had fastened his teeth in the calf of her husband's leg and was holding on for dear life. Seizing a stone in the road, the Irishman's wife was about to hurl it, when the husband, with wonderful presence of mind, shouted:

 

"Mary! Mary! Don't throw the stone at the dog! throw it at me!"

 

 

Thanks

SkVm

 

Post your Jokes: smilejokes.post@gmail.com

Posted by SmileJokes 0 comments

She advanced to the paying teller's window and, handing in a check for fifty dollars, stated that it was a birthday present from her husband and asked for payment. The teller informed her that she must first endorse it.

 

"I don't know what you mean," she said hesitatingly.

 

"Why, you see," he explained, "you must write your name on the back, so that when we return the check to your husband, he will know we have paid you the money."

 

"Oh, is that all?" she said, relieved.... One minute elapses.

 

Thus the "endorsement": "Many thanks, dear, I've got the money. Your loving wife, Evelyn."

 

 

Thanks

 

SkVm

 

Post your Jokes: smilejokes.post@gmail.com

 

Posted by SmileJokes 0 comments

A man went to an insurance office to have his life insured the other day.

 

"Do you cycle?" the insurance agent asked.

 

"No," said the man.

 

"Do you motor?"

 

"No."

 

"Do you, then, perhaps, fly?"

 

"No, no," said the applicant, laughing; "I have no dangerous—"

 

But the agent interrupted him curtly.

 

"Sorry, sir," he said, "but we no longer insure pedestrians."

 

 

Thanks

SkVm

 

 

Post your Jokes: smilejokes.post@gmail.com

Posted by SmileJokes 0 comments

Wrong email id -- too good

http://smilejokes.blogspot.com

A man checked into a hotel.
There was a computer in his room,
So he decided to send an e-mail to his wife.

However, he accidentally typed a wrong e-mail address,
and without realizing his error, he sent the e-mail.

Meanwhile... Somewhere in Houston ,
a widow had just returned from her husband's funeral.
The widow decided to check her e-mail,
expecting condolence messages from relatives and friends.

After reading the first message, she fainted.
The widow's son rushed into the room,
found his mother on the floor,
and saw the computer screen which read:
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I've Reached
Date: 28 July 2008

 

I know you're surprised to hear from me.
They gave computers here,
and we are allowed to send e-mails to loved ones.
I've just reached and have been checked in..
I see that everything has been prepared for your  arrival tomorrow.
Looking forward to seeing you TOMORROW!
 
 
Thanks
SkVm
 
Next Jokes ::
 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

Thanks

Devaraj S
 

 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments


 
A  Scottish couple decided to go to Spain to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years  earlier. 

Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the husband left  Glasgow  and flew to  Barcelona  on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day. The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an email to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and without realizing his error, sent the email. 

Meanwhile, somewhere in Blackpool , a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral. He was a minister who died following a heart attack. 

The widow decided to check her email expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted.

The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read: 

To: My Loving Wife 
Subject: I've Arrived 
Date: October 16, 2008

I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. 

I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that 
everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. 

Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was. 

P.S. F***ing hot down here!
 
 
 

Thanks

John Lameck


Posted by SmileJokes 0 comments

# 10

“Super Star”
RAJINIKANTH




“I don’t like to do romance with young heroines.”



# 9

“Universal Hero”
KAMAL HASSAN


“I don’t like to keep ‘kiss scene’ in my films.”



# 8

“Cheeyan”
VIKRAM


“My age is only 24.”




# 7


SURIYA "



“My height is 8.5 feet.”






# 6

“DHANUSH"


“I am going to act in Part 3 of Terminator.”





# 5

“Ultimate Star”
AJIT KUMAR


“Red is a good movie.”




# 4

“Pratchi Thalapathy”
VISHAL



“After the success of Satyam film, we are planning to take Satyam Part 2.”





# 3

“Little Super Star”
T.R.SILAMBARASAN


“I don’t like romance scenes.”




# 2

JEEVAN


“Only, my films run for more than 800 days.”



Here comes the last, but not least…















# 1

“Ilaya Thalapathy”
Dr. VIJAY



“I am a Zero.” Sorry “I am a Hero.”


Posted by SmileJokes Wednesday, December 2, 2009 0 comments

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS Sunday, November 29, 2009 0 comments

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments


 
Little Johnny and two of his friends were sitting on a front porch one day after school. Billy looked down the street and saw a bright red Corvette. "Some day I'm gonna be a lawyer so I can buy me one of those Corvettes," he said.

Robbie looked over at the driveway next to the Corvette and saw a brand new Ferrari. "I'm gonna be a doctor," he said, "so I can get me a fast Ferrari."

Little Johnny looked over at the other two and replied, "I'm gonna learn how to suck cock when I grow up."

The other two jaws dropped. "That's what my sister does, and she owns both of those cars," explained Little Johnny.

 


 
 





Posted by SkVm.YoUrS Friday, November 27, 2009 0 comments

Nammai Pol Oruvan
 
CM-->COMMON MAN

 
Phone ringing in commisioner office....

 
"Hello."

 
CM: "Mr. I.G.R Marrar... Nan solradha konjam gavanama kelunga. I am sure you are aware of the power of the state of the terror cinema, “Vijay padam (Movie) nu solluvanga”.

 
Avaru nadicha vettaikaran terror cinema unga city’ la 5 edathula release aagapogudhu. There will be many explosions in your city. bye..."

 
Marrar: "Hello... Hello..."

 
(the line went dead...)

 
Asst: "Romba short call sir. trace panna mudiyala."

 
Marrar: "Adutha call varumbodhu adha trace seidhae aaganum. No more excuses."

 
Phone ringing...

 
Marrar: "5 kuthu pattu, 4 fight, konjam sentiment scene. Enda kupanum

suppanum ippadi oru padam eduka mudiyum."

 
CM: "Mr.IGR.Marrar commanding areala irukara theater la pazhaya Vijay movie “Villu”, ooadikittu irukku. Innum 20 mins la show mudiya pogudu.

 
Mudinja pooi padam paakaravangala kaapathikanga."

 
Marrar: "hello... hello..."

 
the line went dead...

 
Marrar: "Emergenecy. Endha theater la vijay padam oadikittu irukko anga security tight pannunga."

 
"yes, sir."

 
Phone ringing in reporter's desk...

 
CM:"Hello Ms.Natasha Rajkumar. This is going to be an important day in your life."

 
Natasha: "Dei, kural maathi pesina adayalam theriyadhu nu nenachutiya?"

 
CM: "Naan unga aal illa. Nan solrada gavanama kelunga. go to satyam
theater with you VC innum 20 minutes la. This is live and this is live."

 
Natasha: "hello... hello...."

 
(line went dead.)

 
cops rushed to Satyam theater..

 
The people inside the theater watching the show were struggling to breathe and live.

cop takes his walkie-talkie: "Sir, the situation is worse. we don't know how to bring them back alive."

 
Marrar phone ringing...

"hello..."

 
CM: "Endha oru kuppanalayum suppanalayum ippadi oru cinema edukka mudiyuma Mr.Marrar? Ippovavadhu serious huh irukingala?"

 
cop:"Sir, innum three minutes la movie mudiya pogudu. Mudinja atthana perum sethuduvanga nu nenaikiraen."

 
CM: "Eppadi kapathanum nu sollava?"

 
Marar: "Please, tell us."

 
CM: "Goto operator room and cut the wire to projector."

 
Marar: "Meduva sollunga."

 
CM:"Meduvava? Operator... room... ku poi... projector... wire ... huh

.. cut panunga..."

 
Marar: "goto operator room and cut the wire to projector."

 
Cop: "yes sir."

 
Line went dead...

 
 
3 PM:

phone ringing...

 
CM: "Hello Mr. Marrar. Neenga pathadu sample daan. his old movie. Ippo varapora vettaikaran ada vida bayangaramanadhu. “ATM, Kuruvi, Villu” Lam vida bayangaramanadhu.

Listen to me. DOn't waste time. You don't have it. Naan solrada seyinga."

 
Marrar: "Enna seya solra?"

 
CM: "Sivakasi, villu, kuruvi, ATM”, inda movie yoda ella printayum eduthukittu Sozavaram Airport ku vanga. Send just 2 cops with that.That cop should have phone with conferencing facility.

I need a huge landing space. Police vedavaigaloda ennikaya adiga paduthamatenga nu nambaren. I want all the copies exactly by 5 PM. "

 
The call ended.

 
Marrar: "Collect all the movies and put it in a safe truck and take it

to Sozavaram airport as he said."

 
Cop: "Sir, they are very dangerous."

 
Marrar: "I know. But inda movies laam ippo vitutu appuram eduthkalaam...

Tamil or Telugu. begin the operation now."

 
"Yes sir."

 
4 PM:

Natasha mobile ringing:

CM:"Hello Ms. Natasha. Somehting is waiting for you in sozavaram

airport. Be there at 5 PM"

The line went dead.

 
5 PM:

 
Phone ringing...

CM: "Mr.Marrar, andha tanker huh anga irukara mark la vitutu 100 feet thalli poga sollunga unga cops huh... Conference call la on pannunga.

 
"Marrar: "Do as he instruct."

 
Cop1: "I'll take villu movie box with me. I need it. We can give other movies.

Cop2: "You are disobeying. Put it there."

 
Cop1: "No..."

 
Cop: "Something unusual has happened. He didn't get the movies to save.

He destroyed all the three movies"

 
Marrar: "You mean all the four?"

 
Cop1: "No. I withheld villu movie Box with me."

 
CM: "Thappu paneteenga Mr.Harrif. Adnayum neenga anga vaechurukanum.

erinju poirukum."

 
Marrar:"Nee enna Thala fan aah, Vijay padam ellam azhikura?"

 
CM: "Viajy padam pudikalaena Thala fan huh daan irukanuma?

 
Vikram fan huh iruka koodada?.

 
Surya fan? Kamal fan?

 
Ivangalukellam ivan (vijay) padatha patha kovame varada?

 
I am just a stupid common man Mr.Marrar. Harrif,

 
irukara anda oru padatha azhichudunga. Ada veliya vita, ada paathu innum neraya per padam eduka aaramichuduvanga...

 
Naan oru tamil cinema fan huh solren, please destroy it. Its in your hand now."

 
Marrar: "Nee ippadi verythanama nadanduka karanam enna? Un kudubathla yaravadu vijay padam paathu sethupoitangala?"

 
CM: "Neenga kaetenga garathukaga solren. 14 year old. We are adults Mr. Marrar. Neenga police vera. Neraya indamari pathurupeenga.

Andha 14 year old Buffalo “kuruvi poster” ah saapittu angeyae sethu poachu. Ida paathu kanner vida, adhu en veetu buffalo va irukanumnu avasiyamilla.

 
Pakathu veetu Buffalo irunda azuga varada Mr.Marrar? harrif, please anda padathoda ella copy ya yum koluthidunga.

 
Anda mari padangal tamil la vandada thadayame iruka koodadhu. Please..."

 
Harrif Burned all the copies.

 
CM: "Neenga bayapadara mari vettaikaran movie huh naan release panala inda diwali ku."

 
Marrar: "I hope so."

 

 

Posted by SmileJokes Wednesday, November 25, 2009 0 comments

Cute Love Story - Different of Its Own
Hi Friends, here is one cute Love Story which I got through mail, which I
would like to share with you all. Do you have 3 minutes? Otherwise
comeback again when you have time.. Read till the end. Am sure it touches
your heart. Here the story goes..
--------
She is my first and the only love till this point. Her name is Nivedita, a
Software Engineer by profession. She is turning 24 shortly and she is
undoubtedly the most beautiful girl on earth. I made it a point to share
my feelings today with her, hoping this letter would do it all. I have not
written any letters in my life till now, and this is perhaps the first
time I pen down my thoughts and expectations for the person I love the
most on earth.
It's been 4 years since we met each other and a strong bond has grown
between us through these years. I was unaware of her love for a long time.
In fact, I hadn't spoken a word with her till about a year I had seen her
for the first time. It was in one long journey in train, I understood her
love for me. It happened a year ago.
It was a trip from Kanyakumari to Chennai in Kanyakumari Express. We had
passed Vizhupuram and it was 3 am in the morning. I thought I was the only
one who was awake in the whole compartment in that early hour. But to my
surprise, she was also awake.
I didn't know then that it was for me she had got up that early. Hardly
had she seemed to move her sight away from me. She smiled at me very often
and every time I encountered that cute smile, I started eagerly awaiting
the next battle with her smile and shining eyes. Her smile had everything
in it, the story of unbelievable affection, care and what not.
From that moment, till now, I too have loved her to a great extent. We
have never exchanged words about the love we have towards each other, but
words are too less to reflect the amount of affection and love we share. I
have always thought that the love would remain throughout our life and it
happened to be the same till 3 months back.
Vivek had come into my life 3 months back. In fact I myself had waited his
arrival for quite a long time, but from the moment he arrived, he has been
the worst enemy in my life. Nivedita and he had grown close over times,
and the fraction of time she spent with me got lowered to a great extent.
Even the latest Sensex fall would be less compared to the fall in her
affection for me.
I have wondered how it could suddenly happen, after near to four long
years of understanding and love amidst us. At times, I have felt like
killing that guy Vivek, but I have not had that much strength or braveness
to do that. Still, what can he do? He did no mistake to his part, except
for being born charming, cute and fair.

Two days before when I saw her, she was feeding food for him and I was
hurt to the core on seeing the incident. My anger had boiled down to
tears, and I broke. It took almost close to three hours for me stop
crying, I felt I had cried more than how much I would have cried when I
was born.
I have been trying to understand where it all went wrong, but to my
fortune, till now, I haven't been able spot it out. Once for all, I
decided to tell all my feelings to her, no matter how she is going to deal
with it. I have heard my dad saying a lot of times 'Something is better
than nothing!' and I made up my mind to do 'something'.
I fixed today to be the 'DATE' for throwing open in front of her the
'TALE' of My Pure Love for her. I don't know whether I will get a positive
response from her, but I pray God that only the best happens.
Trrrrriinnnnnnggggg...
My school bell has rung. The lunch break is over. My 'UKG' classmates
would be ready to welcome me with the same cute smile as ever.
I hope my 'MOTHER' Nivedita will be alright, understands me and shares
some time with me also, apart from that she spends with my 3 months old
rascal 'BROTHER' Vivek.

 

Posted by SmileJokes 0 comments

 

 
A poor Mallu in Kerala, who has no money, no home and a blind old mother
plans to change his life kept praying day and night to God for years
together.

Finally, one day God, happy with his prayers, appears before him!

God: 'Son, I'm truly pleased with your determination and confidence in
me... I see you have something in mind... But my condition is that I can
grant you ONLY ONE wish! So choose wisely and wish for something that is
most important you.....'

The Mallu (shrewd and intelligent as always) thinks for a moment and says
he is ready to make his wish.

God asks him to go ahead and make a wish......

The Mallu with a huge Colgate smile says........ ......... ......... .

'God, my only wish is that you Bless my mother to be able to stand on the
terrace of our 10-storey mansion and see my beautiful loving wife and 15
servants playing in our 40 acre coconut garden below with our 5 healthy
children wearing Diamond bangles!'

God stares at him, completely dumbfounded:

Damn!!!!! I still have a LOT to learn from these Mallus......

So moral of story, What have you learned today?

If a Mallu puts his mind to it... HE CAN DO ANYTHING !!

Mallu Facts:

There is a small state towards the south of India called Kerala, GOD's own
country. The people of that state speak the language Malayalam. The people
are known mostly as Malayalis or Mallu's in short, rather than Keralites.
They have become the major work force in many countries, from CEOs to
common laborers. The only place in the world they do NOT work at all
is.... (you guessed it)- KERALA.!!!!!!!
 
.

Thanks & Regards,

 

MOHAN

 

 



Posted by SmileJokes Tuesday, November 24, 2009 0 comments

                                                                         

 3. When your boss says - "Do the documentation"

Smile - it means "Relax dude, you've done enough of coding, time to give your brains a break"

4. When your boss says - "You do nothing but just surf the internet"

Smile - it means "Dude, now I know where all that knowledge comes from"

5. When your boss says - "Do you come to office to sleep?"

Smile - It means "hey buddy, why do you stress yourself? Have a good night's  

sleep and come to office   whenever you wish!"

 6  . When your boss says - "Stop staring at that girl you moron"

 Smile - it means "My wife is better than her "

 7. When your boss says - "Why does nothing work on your machine?"

 Smile - it means "I am thinking I could rather give you my laptop"

 8. When your boss says - "Would you stop talking on your mobile phone?"

 Smile - it means "Use the office phone instead"

 9. When your boss says - "Why do you keep smiling always?"

 Smile - it means "I love the fact that You are spreading the good will"

 10. When your boss says - "YOU ARE FIRED"

 SLAP HIM IN HIS FACE AND SAY - "I RESIGN"

 

Thanks & Regards,

 

MOHAN



Posted by SmileJokes 0 comments

 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS Friday, November 20, 2009 0 comments

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

A famous admiral and an equally famous general were fishing together
when a sudden squall came up. When it died down both eminent warriors
were struggling helplessly in the water.

The admiral floundered his way back to the boat and pulled himself
painfully in. Then he fished out the general, using an oar.

Catching his breath, he puffed: "Please don't say a word about this to
anyone. If the Navy found I can't swim I'd be disgraced.

"Don't worry," the general said. "Your secret is safe. I'd hate to
have my men find out I can't walk on water

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

The Grandmother of a just got married American Desi phoned that he was
coming to present his beautiful lovely wife to grandma.

The delighted Grandma Desi started giving instructions how to come to
their high rise Desi colony retirement Apartment.


She started blabbering, "When you come to the front door of the
apartment building inside vestibule, My son there is a push button,
push it with your Elbow, I will hear and open the door from my
apartment for you.

You will hear the pi……pi buzz. You push the door with your Elbow and
open. Enter and walk to the Elevator.


Push the UP button with your Elbow and elevator opens. Enter. Push the
#4 button with your Elbow carefully and elevator comes to fourth
floor. Walk to the room number 420 and push the button with your
Elbow. I will open the door for you."


The polite grand son said, "Dear Grand Ma, my wife and I can handle
all these, we have been born here. Don't worry. But explain one thing,
why do you want me to push all the buttons with my Elbow."


The Grandma Desi yelled, "What? Shameless, you are coming without
gifts in your hands for Grandma?"

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other,

 
"Which do you think is farther away... Florida or the moon?"
 
 
The other blonde turns and says "Well, can you see Florida?"
 
 
Thanks
SkVm
 
Smile Jokes Friend connect Click Here
 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

Thanks
SkVm

Posted by SmileJokes 0 comments


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

This is just too beautiful not to share . . ..

 

 

 

"Dear God, this year please send clothes for all those  poor ladies on Grandpa's computer,  Amen."

 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS Wednesday, November 18, 2009 0 comments


A lady went to the police station to file a report for her missing Husband:



Lady:                     I lost my Husband

Inspector:               What is his height

Lady:                     I never noticed

Inspector:               Slim or healthy

Lady:                     Not slim can be healthy

Inspector:               Colour of eyes

Lady:                     Never noticed

Inspector:               Colour of hair

Lady:                     Changes according to season

Inspector:               What was he wearing

Lady:                     suit/casuals I don't remember exactly

Inspector:               Was somebody with him ?????????

Lady:                     Yes my Labrador dog, Calvin,  tied with a golden
chain, height 30 inches, healthy, blue eyes, blackish brown hair, his left
foot
                             thumb nail is slightly broken, he never
barks, wearing a golden belt studded with blue balls, he likes non veg
food, we eat
                             together, we jog together&. And the lady
started crying&.........................................................



 Inspector:  Lets search for the dog first !!!!!!!

 

  Thanks

SkVm

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

 

Posted by SmileJokes 0 comments

"It took me nearly ten years to learn that I couldn't write stories."

 

"I suppose you gave it up then?"

 

"No, no. By that time I had a reputation."

 

**

 

"I dream my stories," said Hicks, the author.

 

"How you must dread going to bed!" exclaimed Cynicus.

 

**

The five-year-old son of James Oppenheim, author of "The Olympian," was recently asked what work he was going to do when he became a man.

 

"Oh," Ralph replied,

 

 "I'm not going to work at all." "Well, what are you going to do, then?

 

“He was asked.”Why," he said seriously,

 

"I'm just going to write stories, like daddy."

 

 

Thanks

smilejokes.blogspot.com

Posted by SmileJokes 0 comments

Thanks
SkVm

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS Monday, November 16, 2009 0 comments

 

All government office related links are available... ..
   

Obtain:

·  Birth Certificate

·  Caste Certificate

·  Tribe Certificate

·  Domicile Certificate

·  Driving Licence

·  Marriage Certificate

·  Death Certificate

·  Search More - How do I

 

Apply for:

·  PAN Card

·  TAN Card

·  Ration Card

·  Passport

·  Inclusion of name in the Electoral Rolls

·  Search More - How do I

 

Register:
 

·  Land/Property

·  Vehicle

·  With State Employment Exchange

·  As Employer

·  Company

·  .IN Domain

·  GOV.IN Domain

·  Search More - How do I

 

Check/Track:

·  Waiting list status for Central Government Housing

·  Status of Stolen Vehicles

·  Land Records

·  Cause list of Indian Courts

·  Court Judgments (JUDIS )

·  Daily Court Orders/Case Status

·  Acts of Indian Parliament

·  Exam Results

·  Speed Post Status

·  Agricultural Market Prices Online

·  Search More - How do I

 

Book/File/Lodge:

·  Train Tickets Online

·  Air Tickets Online

·  Income Tax Returns

·  Complaint with Central Vigilance Commission (CVC)

·  Search More - How do I

 

Contribute to:

·  Prime Minister's Relief Fund

·  Search More - How do I

 

Others:

·  Send Letters Electronically

·  Search More - How do I

 

Search for Available Services

Select from the menu to know the available Services contributed by Central Government Ministries/Departme nts, State Government, UT.

Advance Search

 

Recently Added Online Services

·  Tamil Nadu: Online application of marriage certificate for persons having registered their marriages

·  Tamil Nadu: Online District wise soil Details of Tamil Nadu

·  Tamil Nadu: View Water shed Atlas of Tamil Nadu

·  Tamil Nadu: E-Pension District Treasury Tirunelveli

·  Meghalaya: Search Electoral Roll Online by Name (2008)

·  Meghalaya: Search Electoral Roll Online by EPIC number (2008)

·  Meghalaya: Search Electoral Roll Online by House number (2008)

·  Himachal Pradesh: Revised Pay and Arrears Calculator-Fifth Pay

·  Meghalaya: Search Electoral Roll Online by Part number (2008)

·  Andhra Pradesh: Online Motor Driving School Information

 

 

 

N

Kind regards,

SkVm

Posted by SmileJokes Sunday, November 15, 2009 0 comments


A man wanted to buy his son a parrot as a birthday present..
The next day he went to the pet shop and saw
three identical parrots in a cage.

He asked the clerk, "how much for the parrot on the right?

The owner said it was Rs. 2500.
"Rs. 2500.", the man said. "Well what does he do?
"He knows how to use all of the functions of Microsoft Office 2000,
responds the clerk.
"He can do all of your spreadsheets and type all of your letters."

The man then asked what the second parrot cost.
The clerk replied, Rs. 5000, but he not only knows Office 2000,
but is an expert computer programmer.

Finally, the man inquired about the cost of the last parrot.
The clerk replied, "Rs. 10,000."
Curious as to how a bird can cost Rs. 10,000, the man asked what this
bird's specialty was.
The clerk replies, "Well to be honest I haven't seen him do anything.

But the other two call him *"BOSS"!!


Posted by SkVm.YoUrS Saturday, November 14, 2009 0 comments


On walking into the factory, the Managing Director of the Company noticed a young guy..
leaning against the wall and doing nothing.

He approached the young man and calmly said to him, "How much do you earn?"

The young man was quite amazed that he was asked such A personal question, he replied,
none the less, "I earn $ 2000.00 a month, Sir. Why?"

Without answering, the MD took out his wallet and removed
$6000.00 cash and gave it to the young man and said,

"Around here I pay people for working, not for standing around looking pretty!

Here is your 3 months salary, now GET OUT and don't come back".

The young man turned around and was quickly out of sight.


Noticing a few onlookers, the MD said in a very upset manner,

"And that applies to everybody in this company".

He approached one of the onlookers and asked him, "Who's the young man I just fired?"

To which an amazing reply came - "He was the pizza delivery guy , Sir!"


Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

 

Thanks and Regards,

 

Ravichandran.S

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments


 
On August 21, 2009, a well on the Montara offshore oil platform in Timor Sea, off the northern coast of Western Australia, blew out as a new well was being drilled on the platform by the West Atlas mobile drilling rig. The rig and platform were immediately evacuated as oil, natural gas, and condensate spewed into the ocean from the uncontrolled well. It was estimated that the oil leak could have been something like 2000 barrels/day --- one of the worst oil disaster in Australia.
The first four attempts to plug the oil leak by PTTEP failed, but the fifth attempt succeeded on November 3. On November 1, 2009, during an attempt to plug the leak, a fire broke out on the West Atlas oil rig.
 

 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS Friday, November 13, 2009 0 comments

This is an absolute rib-tickler !! If Parsis can have their name as per the profession, why can't we have it? (Ater all we are not Britishers to have Barber, Cook, Side Bottom, etc...)

Doctor -- Vaidyanathan
Dentist -- Pallavan
Lawyer -- Kesavan
North Indian Lawyer -- Panjabakesan
Financier -- Dhanasekaran
Cardiologist -- Irudhayaraj
Pediatrist -- Kuzhandaisamy
Psychiatrist -- Mano
Sex Therapist -- Kamadevan
Marriage Counselor -- Kalyanasundaram
Ophthalmologist --Kannayiram
ENT Specialist -- Neelakandan
Diabetologist -- Sakkarapani
Nutritionist -- Arogyasamy
Hypnotist -- Sokkalingam
Mentalist -- Budhisikamani
Exorcist -- Maatruboodham
Magician -- Mayandi
Builder -- Sengalvarayan
Painter -- Chitraguptan
Meteorologist -- Kaarmegam
Agriculturist -- Pachaiyappan
Horticulturist -- Pushpavanam
Landscaper -- Bhuminathan
Barber -- Kondaiappan
Beggar -- Pichai
Bartender -- Madhusudhan
Alcoholic -- Kallapiraan
Exhibitionist -- Ambalavaanan
Fiction writer -- Naavalan
Makeup Man -- Singaram
Milk Man -- Paul Raj
Dairy Farmer -- Pasupathi
Dog Groomer -- Naayagan
Snake Charmer -- Nagamurthi
Mountain Climber -- Yezhumalai
Javelin Thrower -- Velayudam
Polevaulter -- Thaandavarayan
Weight Lifter -- Balaraman
Sumo Wrestler -- Gundu Rao
Karate Expert -- Kailaasam
Kick Boxer -- Ethiraj
Batsman -- Dhandiappan
Bowler -- Balaji
Spin Bowler -- Thirupathi
Female Spin Bowler -- Thirupura Sundari
Driver -- Sarathy
Attentive Driver -- Parthasarathy

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

An elderly couple were having dinner at another couple's house and
after their meal, the wives left the table to go to the kitchen.


The two elderly gents were talking, and one says: "Last night we went
out to a fabulous new restaurant .I'd highly recommend."


The other man says: "What's the name of the restaurant?"


The first man thinks long and hard with a furrowed brow, finally
saying: "Ah, what is the name of that red flower you give to someone
you love?"


His friend replies: "A carnation?" "No, no. The other one," the man says.


His friend suggest "The poppy?"


"No, no, no" growls the man.


"You know - the one that is red and has thorns."


His friend says: "Do you mean a rose?"


"Yes! Thank you!" the first man says. He then turns toward the kitchen
and yells: "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last
night?"

Regards,
Vikas Padale,
"Love is like playing the piano. First you must learn to play by the
rules, then you must forget the rules and play from your heart."

Posted by SmileJokes Wednesday, November 11, 2009 0 comments

Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.

A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a
gorgeous young woman on his arm.

A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, "Wow,
you're really doing great, aren't you?"

Morris replied, "I'm just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma
and be cheerful.'"

The doctor said, "I didn't say that! I said, 'You've got a heart
murmur; be careful.'"

*******

Regards,
Vikas Padale,
"Love is like playing the piano. First you must learn to play by the
rules, then you must forget the rules and play from your heart."

Posted by SmileJokes 0 comments

 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

Hi friends enjoy this comedy.

Records:
Russians:  We are living in 48 deg cool temp we are great
Africans: We are living in 48 deg heat  v are great
Tamilan: We are living even after seeing 48 vijay films. Goyala yarkitta......

Bus comedy:
Doctor - Ennappa eppadi adi pattuch
patient - Bus-la porappa 'vijay' padam pottanga,
Theatre-nu ninachu velia vanthutten
Doctor-??\


Chess comedy:

Ajit - chess vilaiyaada povom varingala?
vijay - neega pou ground la wait pannunga naan shoe pottutu varean
vijay rocks

National anthem:

Viajy to prabhudeva: Indha patu superah Iruke idha Namba Padathula
Remake panalama
Prabu Deva: Dei nasama ponavane Adhu Desiya Geetham da

Diff between kamal and vijay

Difference between kamal & vijay:
Kamal acts in 10 diff role in one film(original).
but vijay acts in same role in 10 different dupping films.


Director comedy :

Director - Vadivelu podalama, Illa karunas podalama
Vijay - Comedy kuda nane pannuran sir
Director - Comedy neenga than panringa nan hero yara podalamnu think panran


Doctor vijay:
Dr. vijay sslc goes 2 a shop & shouts where is the free gift with this
mineral water.
Seller: There is no free gift with this
Vijay: But on the lable its written bacteria free. I am doctor u can't cheat me
Enjoy non stop doctor vijay comedies

Driver - Sorry sir petrol mulusa dry aagidichi , inimel oru adi kuda
munnadi nagarathu
Dogtor vijay - Hmm.. sari reverse edu veetukavathu pokalam

Exam hall:

Ajith & vijay writing semester exam:
vijay : Thala konjam answer kattunga
Ajit: Hindi paper da idhu unnaku tamil exam da
vijay: Parravala adha kattunga na tamila remake pannikuraen
Thala: Idhuku picha edukalaam
vijay: yevalavo panrom idhu panna maatomaa......


Exclusive vijay comedies

1. How a police can wear boot cut and have style hair?(pokiri)
2. How to go to final match after losing semi finals?(Gilli)
3. How to become boxer in 1 day & 1 song? (Badri)
4.How to come alive even after dying?(puthya geethai)
5. And finally having a long jump record for a half a KM in kuruvi....
  Still to be continued :-) enna koduma sir idhu....


TV special:


Customer. Intha TV velai enna?

Salesman: 1,00,000 sir

Cus: Appadi enna special?

Salesman: Tv la "vijay" program vanda aduve thana vera channel maridum

Suntv:

vijay : Namma suntv mela case podanum

Manager :  Ethukku sir

vijay : Ennoda aduthapadam hit aagumnu sonnatha, vilayatu seithil la
pottu irukanga

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments


வேட்டைக்காரனை டரியலாக்கும் குறுஞ்செய்திகள்

விஜய்
படம் ரிலீஸ் என்றாலே நம்ம பயலுகளுக்கு கொண்டாட்டம் தான்...... அப்படி என்னதான் சந்தோசமோ வேட்டைக்காரனை பற்றி கலாய்த்து குறுஞ்செய்தி அனுப்பும் பயலுகளுக்கு... இந்த பயலுக அனுப்புற குறுஞ்செய்தி தமிழில் உள்ள எல்லா நடிகர்களுக்கும் பொருந்தும். என்பதும் அவர்களுக்கு தெரியும்............... இருந்தாலும் என்ன பண்றது காய்ச்ச மரம்தானே கல்லடி படும்.........
 
விஜயின்
.அவ்வ்வ்வ்.மன்னிச்சுடுங்க சன் பிக்சர்ஸின் ...... வேட்டைக்காரனை டரியலாக்கி வந்த குறுஞ்செய்திகள் சில......

1.
காதல் என்பது விஜய் படம் மாதிரி.பார்க்காதவன் பார்க்க துடிப்பான். பார்த்தவன் சாக துடிப்பான்

2.
டைரக்டர்:நம்மளோட அடுத்த படம் 100நாள் ஓடனும்
விஜய்
: இல்லை 200நாள் ஓடனும்
டைரக்டர்
: ஜோக் அடிக்காதிங்க சார்
விஜய்
: ங்கொய்யாலமுதல்ல ஜோக் அடிச்சது யாரு நீயா? நானா?

3.
ரிப்போர்ட்டர் : சார் உங்களோட வேட்டைக்காரன் படத்தின் ரிலீஸ் தேதி தள்ளி போய்ட்டே இருக்குதே ஏன்?
விஜய்
: சென்சார் போர்டு மெம்பர்ஸ் படத்த பாக்க பயப்படுறாங்க.

4.
முதல் பரிசு அடையார்ல பிளாட், ரெண்டாவது பரிசு கார்
போட்டி
நடக்கும் இடம் சேப்பாக்கம் கிரவுண்டு.
தகுதி
: எதையும் தாங்கும் இதயம்
போட்டி
என்னன்னா விஜய் நடிச்ச ஒரு படம் பாக்கனும்
போட்டியின்
விதிகள் : படம் பாக்கும் போது வாந்தி எடுக்கக்கூடாது,அவர் என்ன பண்ணினாலும் திட்டாம படம் பாக்கனும்...முக்கியமா உயிரோட இருக்கனும்

5.
விஜய் அரசியலில் சேர்ந்து தமிழ்நாட்டின் முதலமைச்சரானால் தன்னுடைய முதல் பட்ஜெட்டைஎப்படி தயாரிப்பார்.
-
-

ஆந்திராவின்
பட்ஜெட்டை ஒரு ஜெராக்ஸ் காப்பி எடுப்பார்( ரீமேக்)

6.
குயில புடிச்சி கூண்டில் அடைச்சு கூவ சொல்லுகிற உலகம்
"
விஜய" புடிச்சி காச கொடுத்து நடிக்க சொல்ற உலகம்
அது
எப்படி நடிக்கும் ஐயா.. படம் எப்படி ஓடும் ஐயா?

7.
விஜயின் அடுத்த 7 படங்கள்
வேட்டைக்காரன்
, சமையல்காரன், குடிகாரன்,பைத்தியக்காரன்,பிச்சைக்காரன்,குடுகுடுப்பைக்காரன்

8.
டிரைவர் : சாரி சார் பெட்ரோல் டிரை ஆகிடிச்சு..இனிமேல் வண்டி ஓரு அடி கூட முன்னாடி நகராது
விஜய்
: சரி ரிவர்ஸ் எடு வீட்டுக்காவது போகலாம்.

9. 140
பேரைக் கொன்ற சதாமுக்கு தூக்குத்தண்டனை.6 கோடி பேரை கொல்ல வரும் வேட்டைக்காரன் விஜய்க்கு என்ன தண்டனை?.

10.
எமன் : நான் உன் உயிரை எடுக்க போகிறேன். உன் கடைசி ஆசை என்ன?.
விஜய்
: நான் நடிச்ச வேட்டைக்கரன்படத்தை நீங்க பாக்கனும்.
எமன்
: ங்கொய்யால நான் உன்ன கொல்ல பாத்தா நீ என்ன கொல்ல பாக்குறியே.......

11.
ரிப்போர்ட்டர்: விஜய் சார் ஏன் வேட்டைக்காரன் வேளியாகும் தேதிய சொல்லலமட்றீங்க
விஜய்
: சாகுற நாள் தெரிஞ்சா வாழ்ற நாள் நரகமாயிடும் அதான் சொல்லலை.


 
****************************************************************************************


Thanks & Regards,

 

MOHAN



 


Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments


 

 

 


  

Do the math  correctly!!  
 
 Who is your role model?
  
 FIND OUT WHO TRULY IS YOUR ROLE MODEL. DON'T SCROLL DOWN YET, DO  THE SIMPLE MATH BELOW, THEN SCROLL DOWN TO FIND YOUR HERO.
  
 It's CRAZY how accurate this is!
  
 No peeking!
  
 1) Pick your favorite number between 1-9.
  
 2) Multiply by 3 then.
  
 3) Add 3.
  
 4) Then again  Multiply by 3 (I'll wait while you get  the calculator....)
  
 5) You'll get a 2 or 3 digit  number....
  
 6) Add the digits  together
  
  
 Now  Scroll down
           
 
 
With that number,  see who your ROLE MODEL is from the list below:
 
 
1.       Einstein
 2.      Oprah Winfrey
 3.      Snoopy
 4.      Bill  Clinton
 5.      Bill Gates
 6.      Gandhi
 7.      Michelle Obama

 
8.      Lena  Horne  
9.      
Bill Kerrell 

10.   Jackie Kennedy
 I know, I know....I just have that effect on people.   One day, you  too can be like  me.
  
 P.S.  Stop picking different numbers!!  
I AM YOUR  IDOL, JUST DEAL WITH IT!!!!!!   NOW CLICK  "FORWARD", PUT YOUR NAME IN NO. 9 AND SEND IT ON FOR A  GOOD LAUGH!!   
  


 

 

 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

 


   
      
A  guy is driving around the back woods of Montana  and he sees a sign in front of a broken down  shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale ' He  rings the bell and the owner appears and tells  him the dog is in the backyard.

The guy goes into  the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador  retriever sitting there.


'You talk?' he  asks.
 


'Yep,' the Lab  replies.
 



After the guy  recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk,  he says 'So, what's your story?'

The Lab looks up and  says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when  I was pretty young. I wanted to help the  government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all  they had me jetting from country to country,  sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders,  because no one figured a dog would be  eavesdropping.'
 
'I was one of their most  valuable spies for eight years running. But the  jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I  wasn't getting any younger so I decided to  settle down. I signed up for a job at the  airport to do some undercover security,  wandering near suspicious characters and  listening in. I uncovered some incredible  dealings and was awarded a batch of  medals.' 'I got  married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just  retired.'
 

The guy is amazed.  He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants  for the dog.
 


'Ten dollars,' the  guy says.


'Ten dollars? This  dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him  so cheap?'
 

'Because he's a  liar. He never did any of that shit.
  

 
 
 
 



 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 0 comments

Received from a friend! –

If George W. Bush had been the first President to need a teleprompter
installed to be able to get through a press conference, would you have
laughed and said this is more proof of how he inept he is on his own
and is really controlled by smarter men behind the scenes?

If George W. Bush had spent hundreds of thousands of dollars to take
Laura Bush to a play in NYC, would you have approved?

If George W. Bush had reduced your retirement plan's holdings of GM
stock by 90% and given the unions a majority stake in GM, would you
have approved?

If George W. Bush had made a joke at the expense of the Special
Olympics, would you have approved?

If George W. Bush had given Gordon Brown a set of inexpensive and
incorrectly formatted DVDs, when Gordon Brown had given him a
thoughtful and historically significant gift, would you have approved?


If George W. Bush had given the Queen of England an iPod containing
videos of his speeches, would you have thought this embarrassingly
narcissistic and tacky?

If George W. Bush had bowed to the King of Saudi Arabia , would you
have approved?

If George W. Bush had visited Austria and made reference to the
non-existent "Austrian language," would you have brushed it off as a
minor slip?

If George W. Bush had filled his cabinet and circle of advisers with
people who cannot seem to keep current in their income taxes, would
you  have approved?

If George W. Bush had been so Spanish illiterate as to refer to "Cinco
de Cuatro" in front of the Mexican ambassador when it was the 5th of
May (Cinco de Mayo), and continued to flub it when he tried again,
would you have winced in embarrassment?

If George W. Bush had misspelled the word "advice" would you have
hammered him for it for years like Dan Quayle and potato as proof of
what a dunce he is?

If George W. Bush had burned 9,000 gallons of jet fuel to go plant a
single tree on Earth Day, would you have concluded he's a hypocrite?

If George W. Bush's administration had okayed Air Force One flying low
over millions of people followed by a jet fighter in downtown
Manhattan  causing widespread panic, would you have wondered whether
they actually  get what happened on 9-11?

If George W. Bush had failed to send relief aid to flood victims
throughout the Midwest with more people killed or made homeless than
in  New Orleans , would you want it made into a major ongoing
political issue  with claims of racism and incompetence?

If George W. Bush had created the position of 32 Czars who report
directly to him, bypassing the House and Senate on much of what is
happening in America , would you have approved.

If George W. Bush had ordered the firing of the CEO of a major
corporation, even though he had no constitutional authority to do so,
would you have approved?

If George W Bush had proposed to double the national debt, which had
taken more than two centuries to accumulate, in one year, would you
have approved?

If George W. Bush had then proposed to double the debt again within 10
years, would you have approved?

So, tell me again, what is it about Obama that makes him so brilliant
and impressive? Can't think of anything? Don't worry. He's done all
this in less than a year -- so you'll have three years plus to come up
with an answer.

LET'S SEE HOW MANY OF YOU FORWARD THIS...

Posted by SkVm.YoUrS 1 comments

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